本文來(lái)源于戴汨（愉悅資本創(chuàng)始合伙人）微信公眾號(hào)：Thinkingslow緩慢思考

編者按：Sam Altman 在今年4月22日剛過(guò)完其30歲生日，他曾被《商業(yè)周刊》評(píng)為最優(yōu)秀的年輕企業(yè)家，19歲就創(chuàng)立了位置服務(wù)提供商 Loopt ，2014年出任YC掌門人。如下是他給朋友的36條人生建議：

上周我30歲了。有個(gè)朋友讓我想想，回顧過(guò)去10年，有什么值得傳承的人生建議。我有點(diǎn)猶豫，通常這樣的清單會(huì)很空洞，我把我的回答整理成一個(gè)干凈的版本：

1）重視家庭和朋友。有幾個(gè)知己勝過(guò)一百個(gè)熟人。不要和老朋友失去聯(lián)系。偶爾不妨徹夜長(zhǎng)談。多聚會(huì)。

2）人生不是帶妝彩排。要分秒必爭(zhēng)。生命有限，時(shí)光飛逝。做自己開心并且有成就感的事情。很少有人死后還會(huì)被記住。不要做那些不開心的事(特別是別人要求你做的事)。不要花時(shí)間在不喜歡的人身上。遠(yuǎn)離消極的人。消極極其有害。想做的事情，不要找借口不做。

　3）如何成功：選擇做正確的事情(這至關(guān)重要而又經(jīng)常被忽視)、專注、相信自己(特別是別人告訴你不行的時(shí)候)、和能幫助你的人建立聯(lián)系、學(xué)會(huì)識(shí)別人才，勤奮工作。找到自己想做的事情不容易，開始的想法總是比較粗糙。

　4）關(guān)于工作：你不上心的工作很難做出大的成就。如果工作不喜歡，也很難完全開心或有成就感。努力工作(可能有人因此不高興)，但也不要徹底忽視你生活的其他部分。 目標(biāo)成為某個(gè)專業(yè)領(lǐng)域最好的，即使最后沒(méi)達(dá)到，你也不會(huì)太差。搞清楚你的生產(chǎn)效率系統(tǒng)—諸如不要無(wú)計(jì)劃、或不在最佳狀態(tài)工作。不要害怕職業(yè)冒險(xiǎn)，特別人生早期。很多人隨機(jī)的選擇職業(yè)—認(rèn)真思考你喜歡什么，哪些領(lǐng)域能夠成功，和那些領(lǐng)域的人多交流。

5）關(guān)于錢：錢或許不能帶來(lái)快樂(lè)，但錢能買來(lái)自由。這很重要。沒(méi)錢會(huì)有壓力。大多數(shù)情況下，保證你有足夠的錢能交房租，這比有錢能買的起飛機(jī)，更能影響你的幸福指數(shù)。掙錢通常比花錢很有趣，盡管我從未后悔花錢幫助朋友、獲得新體驗(yàn)、節(jié)省時(shí)間、旅行或其他有有意義的事情。

6）多和人交談。多讀長(zhǎng)內(nèi)容，少發(fā)tweets。少看TV， 少花時(shí)間在網(wǎng)上。

7）不要浪費(fèi)時(shí)間。大部分人大部分時(shí)候都是在浪費(fèi)時(shí)間，特別在生意上。

　　8)不要任人擺布。像PaulGraham有一次對(duì)我說(shuō)：人能變得令人生畏，但很難預(yù)測(cè)誰(shuí)。(自信和傲慢有巨大差別，去做前者。)

　　9)每天，每年，每10年都要有清晰的目標(biāo)。

　　10)計(jì)劃固然重要，但機(jī)會(huì)來(lái)了不要錯(cuò)過(guò)。有時(shí)候有一點(diǎn)不顧后果，也不用擔(dān)心。努力工作的一個(gè)好處就是：機(jī)會(huì)自然會(huì)來(lái)。但機(jī)會(huì)來(lái)了，仍然看你能否抓住。

　　11)和聰明、有趣并且有雄心的人呆在一起。為他們工作或者雇傭他們(工作最讓人滿足的一個(gè)原因就是能和真正優(yōu)秀的人形成深度的關(guān)系)?；〞r(shí)間和那些在某個(gè)領(lǐng)域最棒的人一起，或者和那些有巨大潛力但仍未可知的人一起。和誰(shuí)在一起花的時(shí)間多，你就會(huì)成為他們一樣的人。

　　12)不要讓不重要的事情占據(jù)注意力。這點(diǎn)怎么強(qiáng)調(diào)都不為過(guò)，但是大部分人還是做不到。讓分散注意力的事情遠(yuǎn)離你生活。特別在工作上，你要有方法不要讓那些狗屎事情堆在你面前，占據(jù)你的精力。

　　13)不要隨便發(fā)火。就這一條，就能給你人生帶來(lái)很多機(jī)會(huì)。

　　14)夏天是最好的時(shí)光。

　　15)不要杞人憂天。人生的事情并不像看起來(lái)那么危險(xiǎn)。多部分人太趨于避險(xiǎn)，因此大部分的建議都是偏向保守的路徑。

　　16)問(wèn)問(wèn)自己，想要什么。

　　17)不做會(huì)遺憾的事情，就放手去做。遺憾是最糟糕的。大部分人遺憾沒(méi)做的事情，遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)超過(guò)他們實(shí)際去做的事情。遲疑不決的時(shí)候，只管去做。

　　18)多運(yùn)動(dòng)，健康飲食，保證睡眠。定期去戶外走走。

　　19)用你的方式助人為樂(lè)。人生很少是讓人滿意的。對(duì)陌生人友善一點(diǎn)。

　　20)年輕是美好的，不要辜負(fù)。20多歲的時(shí)候，不妨采取“給我理財(cái)原則，但我不一定做”的態(tài)度。 多少錢也換不來(lái)時(shí)光。

　　21)經(jīng)常告訴你父母：你愛(ài)他們。多回家陪陪父母。

　　22)這一切都會(huì)過(guò)去。

　　23)求知若渴。

　　24)經(jīng)常嘗試新鮮事物。這非常重要。嘗試新事物讓你感覺(jué)時(shí)光緩慢、增加快樂(lè)、保持生活有趣，并且會(huì)防止思維僵化。不管在個(gè)人生活還是職業(yè)生活中，每一年都嘗試做一件大的、新的、有風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的事。

　　25)還記得少年時(shí)，你是多么熱烈的愛(ài)你的男/女朋友吧?請(qǐng)一如既往。還記得孩子的時(shí)候，得到一點(diǎn)小東西是多么興奮和開心吧? 請(qǐng)一如既往。

　　26)不要欺負(fù)別人，不要斷人后路。小心選擇戰(zhàn)場(chǎng)

　　27)學(xué)會(huì)原諒。

　　28)不要追逐地位。沒(méi)有內(nèi)涵的地位不能持久。

　　29)中庸，莫偏激。物極必反。

　　30)存在的焦慮感是生活的一部分。通常這種焦慮感伴隨于人生的大事件左右或在主要的事業(yè)里程碑之后。這種焦慮感經(jīng)常影響那些聰明而有雄心的人。我想，有些人努力工作的一個(gè)原因就是：避免去花時(shí)間思考它。感到焦慮沒(méi)什么不對(duì)。你并不孤獨(dú)。

　　31)心存感激，正面看待問(wèn)題。不要抱怨，不要嫉妒別人的成功(但是記?。簞e人會(huì)記恨你的成功，學(xué)會(huì)忽視它。)

　　32)做行動(dòng)的巨人，而不是口頭。

　　33)時(shí)間可以磨平一切。人類擅長(zhǎng)這個(gè)。

　　34)先思而后行。憤怒的時(shí)候，思考幾分鐘。

　　35)不要過(guò)快對(duì)人下判斷。你永遠(yuǎn)不知道完整的故事，以及他們?yōu)槭裁醋龌虿蛔瞿呈隆Ｒ型硇摹?/p>

　　36)一日漫長(zhǎng)，十年很短。

英文原文：

　I turned30 last week and a friend asked me if I’d figured outany life advice in the past decade worth passing on. I’m somewhat hesitant topublish this because I think these lists usually seem hollow, but here is acleaned up version of my answer:

　1) Never put your family, friends, orsignificant other low on your priority list. Prefer a handful of truly close friends to a hundredacquaintances. Don’t lose touch with old friends. Occasionally stay up until the sun rises talking topeople. Have parties.

2) Life is not a dress rehearsal—this is probably it. Make it count. Time is extremely limited and goes by fast. Do what makes you happy and fulfilled—few people get remembered hundreds of years after they dieanyway. Don’t dostuff that doesn’t make you happy (this happens mostoften when other people want you to do something). Don’t spend timetrying to maintain relationships with people you don’tlike, and cut negative people out of your life. Negativity is really bad. Don’t let yourself make excusesfor not doing the things you want to do.

　　　　　　　　3) How to succeed: pick the right thing to do(this is critical and usually ignored), focus, believe in yourself (especiallywhen others tell you it’s not going to work), developpersonal connections with people that will help you, learn to identify talentedpeople, and work hard. It’s hard to identify what to work on because original thoughtis hard.

　　　4) On work: it’sdifficult to do a great job on work you don’t careabout. And it’shard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’tlike what you do for your work. Workvery hard—a surprising number of people will beoffended that you choose to work hard—but not so hardthat the rest of your life passes you by. Aim to be the best in the world at whatever you doprofessionally. Even ifyou miss, you’ll probably end up in a pretty goodplace. Figure out your own productivitysystem—don’t waste time beingunorganized, working at suboptimal times, etc. Don’t be afraid to take somecareer risks, especially early on. Most people pick their career fairly randomly—really think hard about what you like, what fields are goingto be successful, and try to talk to people in those fields.

　　　5) On money: Whether or not money can buyhappiness, it can buy freedom, and that’s a big deal. Also, lack of money is very stressful. In almost all ways, having enough money sothat you don’t stress about paying rent does more tochange your wellbeing than having enough money to buy your own jet. Making money is often more fun thanspending it, though I personally have never regretted money I’vespent on friends, new experiences, saving time, travel, and causes I believein.

　　　　6) Talk to people more. Read more long content and less tweets. Watch less TV. Spend less time on the Internet.

　　　　7) Don’t waste time. Most people waste most of their time,especially in business.

　　　8) Don’t let yourselfget pushed around. As PaulGraham once said to me, “People can become formidable,but it’s hard to predict who”. (There is a big difference betweenconfident and arrogant. Aim forthe former, obviously.)

　　　9) Have clear goals for yourself every day,every year, and every decade.

　　　10) However, as valuable as planning is, if agreat opportunity comes along you should take it. Don’t be afraid to do somethingslightly reckless. One ofthe benefits of working hard is that good opportunities will come along, but it’s still up to you to jump on them when they do.

　　　11) Go out of your way to be around smart,interesting, ambitious people. Workfor them and hire them (in fact, one of the most satisfying parts of work isforging deep relationships with really good people). Try to spend time with people who areeither among the best in the world at what they do or extremely promising buttotally unknown. Itreally is true that you become an average of the people you spend the most timewith.

　　　12) Minimize your own cognitive load fromdistracting things that don’t really matter. It’s hard tooverstate how important this is, and how bad most people are at it. Get rid of distractions in your life. Develop very strong ways to avoid lettingcrap you don’t like doing pile up and take your mentalcycles, especially in your work life.

　　　13) Keep your personal burn rate low. This alone will give you a lot ofopportunities in life.

　　　　14) Summers are the best.

　　15) Don’t worry somuch. Things in life are rarely as riskyas they seem. Mostpeople are too risk-averse, and so most advice is biased too much towardsconservative paths.

　　　16) Ask for what you want.

　　　17) If you think you’regoing to regret not doing something, you should probably do it. Regret is the worst, and most peopleregret far more things they didn’t do than things theydid do. When in doubt, kiss the boy/girl.

　　18) Exercise. Eat well. Sleep. Get outinto nature with some regularity.

　　　19) Go out of your way to help people. Few things in life are as satisfying. Be nice to strangers. Be nice even when it doesn’t matter.

　　　20)Youth is a really great thing. Don’t waste it. In fact, in your 20s, I think it’s ok to take a “Give me financialdiscipline, but not just yet” attitude. All the money in the world will never getback time that passed you by.

　　21) Tell your parents you love them more often. Go home and visit as often as you can.

　　　22) This too shall pass.

　　　23) Learn voraciously.

　　　24) Do new things often. This seems to be really important. Not only does doing new things seem toslow down the perception of time, increase happiness, and keep lifeinteresting, but it seems to prevent people from calcifying in the ways thatthey think. Aim to do something big, new, andrisky every year in your personal and professional life.

　　　25) Remember how intensely you loved your boyfriend/girlfriendwhen you were a teenager? Lovehim/her that intensely now. Remember how excited and happy you got about stuff as a kid? Get that excited and happy now.

　　26) Don’t screw peopleand don’t burn bridges. Pick your battles carefully.

　　　　27) Forgive people.

　　　　28) Don’t chase status. Status without substance doesn’t work for long and is unfulfilling.

　　　29) Most things are ok in moderation. Almost nothing is ok in extreme amounts.

　　30) Existential angst is part of life. It is particularly noticeable around majorlife events or just after major career milestones. It seems to particularly affect smart,ambitious people. I thinkone of the reasons some people work so hard is so they don’thave to spend too much time thinking about this. Nothing is wrong with you for feeling this way; you arenot alone.

　　　31) Be grateful and keep problems in perspective. Don’t complain toomuch. Don’t hateother people’s success (but remember that some peoplewill hate your success, and you have to learn to ignore it).

　　　　32) Be a doer, not a talker.

　　33) Given enough time, it is possible to adjustto almost anything, good or bad. Humans are remarkable at this.

　　　34) Think for a few seconds before you act. Think for a few minutes if you’re angry.

　　　　35) Don’t judge otherpeople too quickly. Younever know their whole story and why they did or didn’tdo something. Beempathetic.

　　　36) The days are long but the decades areshort.